bring it failure

Heyyyyyy

This blog is gonna be a real one. It's for all you dreamers, world changers, and fighters who wonder if you're enough. For all you 2021 optimists out there who wanna make this year better but have no idea how. Those of you who wanna get your life together but low key feel like a hot mess. The ones who dream but also fear, who overthink yet are afraid to speak, who tend to show grace to everyone but themselves. Who sometimes feel like you are not enough, yet still wanna change the world.

Hi nice to meet ya, join the club, you aren't alone.

Now let's get talking.

First off, please reread this again however many times you need to:

you are not alone.

We aren't here to pretend today, we are gonna be real and we are gonna do it with no shame okay?

So in no shame, let me say that i am a real human who has been struggling lately. I found myself a couple months ago with a ton of dreams and no idea how to make them happen. I want to impact the world and be seen and heard, yet constantly question if others really wanna hear what I have to say. If I am enough.

just know, if you can relate, it doesn't make you a bad person, it just makes you human.

We are all humans, and as humans the fear of failure is very real.

In my heart, i know I want to write all the books and start all the podcasts, to send letters to all my friends, be creative, have a ton of friends, the perfect relationship, gain an instagram following, share Jesus with the world, have a successful blog, be a social butterfly, and get 8 hours of sleep each night and wow... even just writing all of that i'm exhausted.

Which is usually where I end up after dreaming for a little bit.

I see my dreams and then look at my own abilities and feel like there is no way I am enough to accomplish all my heart longs to do.

I mean, how can i change the world when i struggle to even share the Gospel with the lady at the checkout?

And there it is. Feeling defeated before I even started. satan getting his way. Thinking, "wow, how in the world am I going to make this all happen... and even worse,,, what if I fail?"

Maybe you can understand when I say that the concept of "Failure" in my mind has been a big no no.

We (as in me and my 50 personalities) don't like failing, no we do not, nope we will pass thanks though.

satan never fails when it comes to the lies, that's for sure.

Maybe you've heard some of the same ones I have, like the "You will look stupid" or "people don't wanna hear what you have to say" or even more so "what if people think you are a failure" which usually leads me spiraling and not doing anything. Crippled by fear and worries and too concerned about tons of opinions that honestly shouldn't matter.

but hey, i am human, and the reality is that us humans usually do care way too much about what other people think.

As you can see, i tend to spiral very fast. (don't worry, ya girl is working on that in counseling and it's been getting better) but to say the least i go from 0 to 100 realllll fast.

And in the midst of it all somehow fear has replaced my dreams and I am left feeling inadequate and not capable. And boom...there off in the distance you can see a dream obliviated before it even got to take off.

Can any of y'all relate? whether it be with one of your "New year New you" resolutions or a dream you pushed into the back of your mind years ago because it scares you a little too much, or maybe even just finding the courage to share the Gospel with a stranger? ... yup, sounds like we are all in the same boat.

May i start with saying something my roommate had to tell me last week.

You are amazing, you are capable, and you can do this. But you are going to fail, and that isn't a bad thing.

You don't have to be enough because God is enough.

you don't have to have all the right words to share the Gospel or start a podcast or write a book because God is a God who is able to use whatever we are willing to give to Him. If we were perfect then God would not be glorified? no, our desire to be perfect results in us being glorified. However, our imperfections and shortcomings do glorify God. Not because of what we can do, but because of what He can.

It says in Luke 18:27 "Jesus replied, "what is impossible with man is possible with God."

If God could use the death and crucifixion of His son on the cross to save the world...then why don't we believe that he can use our broken words and willing heart to further his Kingdom and bring him glory?

You are going to realize that sometimes greater impact comes out of the "failure" then would have come out of any success.

I mean, i honestly think that failure needs to be redefined because it has gotten a real bad rep. And in doing that, I think we also need to redefine success.

it's ironic that when i looked up the definition of success, it said "the good or bad outcome of an undertaking."

GOOD OR BAD.

so you're telling me a bad outcome can still mean success? Yes. can i get an amen!

Let's set it straight, success does NOT mean perfection. And let me tell you, that is still something I am having to learn.

Success cannot be defined by anyone except the one who literally took all the brokenness of this world and overcame it.

King Jesus Himself! can I get an amen again?

And if God could take all the brokenness of the world and the sin and darkness and still use it for good, how much more could he use our failures and doubts?

You do not define your success, your Creator does because He created you for a purpose. Now yes I understand you want your purpose to maybe include a handsome husband to love, a clean house, a well paying job, the perfect Instagram pictures, and the happiest adventures right?

pshh dont we all.

But a purpose runs deeper than that. It is essentially the identity of a Creation. the very thing the Creator made it's creation to do, what it was created for.

well let me tell ya, you were made by your Creator for your Creator. To bring glory to Him and to be loved by Him. Wow.

so essentially, you are already killing it because your existence brings glory to our King.

Now let's dig a bit deeper.

Yes, there are things we can do to intentionally love and glorify our God, like sharing with others how amazing He is or sharing the Gospel that they can experience the freedom you found in knowing you had a purpose given to you by a Creator. But this can also look like sitting and basking in the sun rays as the sun sets in awe of who God is, or loving those around you deeply. Or like actually choosing faith over fear and chasing the dreams God has put upon your heart. (oop sorry you know I got ya there).

I know for me, the majority of my life I have been so worried about being enough on my own. Whether it be to glorify God and make Him proud or to somehow make my dreams a reality, and in the midst of my strivings I missed out on truly what it means to enjoy God. To learn who my Creator is and in turn learn who I am. To exist knowing that my Creator delights in me and i in Him. I was so worried that I would disappoint Him and myself...and i thought anything short of perfection would result in that. Wow that's a heavy weight to carry. The approval of God, the success of our life, the impact of our actions...oh no wonder I am tired and you might be too. We are trying to carry a load we were never intended to.

Have you ever felt that before? If you search your heart do you think that maybe you would find that fear of failure is really fear of disappointment? That you alone must strive to hold the success and power of your life?

Well let me tell you right now that is not true, God is a God of rest, not of striving. A God of love not of disappointment.

I think we forget that God already can see what we will accomplish in the future, He knows what we will do with our lives. And it's not like He has gotten up and thrown in the towel. No.

Because He believes in you, so why don't we believe in us too?

We literally have all of heaven and God by our side, so if God is for us then what or who can stand against us?

Yes we might fail, we may go down one path only to realize we were heading in the wrong direction, and at times we will stumble and fall. Oh but isn't that the beautiful part about grace, the literal purpose of the gospel?

God meets us in our imperfections. In our failures, in our shortcomings.

And He is our biggest cheerleader, cheering us on every step of the way. Proud of us for trying no matter what the turnout. So today, maybe be more concerned with having a willing and courageous heart over a perfect and flawless plan. Be willing to fail and look silly knowing that you won't remember any of that when you are standing before your King Jesus Creator forever one day in eternity.

When we accept ourselves as who we are knowing we are imperfect and that won't change on this side of heaven, then we allow ourselves the freedom to be imperfect human beings serving a perfect God. And that is where the power lies, knowing that we are imperfect but He is perfect, and He came down and meets us in our imperfections.

what if today you allowed yourself the freedom to be an imperfect human being serving a perfect God?

What would you do today if you chose faith over fear?

God over your circumstances?

Hey, you can choose that today.

Live in the freedom you have been given. Make the choice.

I believe in you.

Come on, we can do this.

And by this, I mean we can fail. And wow, imagine how scared satan will be knowing that a lot more dreams are about to become realities.

Not even failure can stop us now.

Go out in faith beloved. And don't worry, if you fall, Your Savior will always be there to catch you.

And remember, just as God shows you grace, you can show yourself grace too.

I love y'all!

Now let's go dare to fail in 2021.

And remember, you don't need a big following in order to follow Jesus.

Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalm 145:14 He helps those who are in trouble; he lifts those who have fallen.

Lamentations 3:22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.

Songs of Worship:

Stand in Your Love: Bethel Music & Josh Baldwin

Courageous: Casting Crowns

There Was Jesus: Zach Williams & Dolly Parton

My Story: Big Daddy Weave